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18 November 2009 @ 02:44 pm
Confused  
Summary: Colonel Roy Mustang was never confused.


Generally speaking, Colonel Roy Mustang was not confused. He knew he liked women – well, he more than knew. He had a date almost every night and took more than half of them to bed. Some of them more than once, although his usual policy was not for long standing relationships, he was not the kind of guy to commit himself to someone.

However; he also like beautiful men, there was no doubt on that part. Some of those men often came back for more. And with them it was easier – a drink or two, perhaps a talk or something manly, and then to a hotel. Not as difficult as women – buying flowers, chocolates, gifts and whatnot.

There was one rule he vowed never to break. Have a relationship with one of his subordinates. He had made himself that promise when he had decided to rise to Fuhrer. Maes had helped him keep that promise, often doing background checks for him.

If Hughes could see him now, he'd be laughing. Roy was sure of it. Because he had fallen for one of his subordinates.

Of course he had always been involved with Major Edward Elric on a more personal level; much like he was with Hawkeye because he did find both Elric brothers and kept watch over them.

At twelve Ed had been feisty, angry and determined, he was also very young and had a childish face. There was no interest, but a kind of paternal kindness that lurked in the back of his heart refusing to come forward.

At thirteen Edward was still childlike, his anger and temper no less cool than it had been when he was twelve. Ed was still determined and that paternal kindness was still etched into his heart, Maes often complimented him on his good find – that Ed was a good kid.

At fourteen Ed was just starting to lose that childishness, his anger had grown, even as his height hadn't. His determination was unending and his love for his brother was boundless. Hawkeye had said Ed was growing up nicely – that he was training him to be insubordinate. There were stirrings in his heart he chose to ignore.

At fifteen Edward didn't have much innocence left. His temper was as vibrant as his golden hair, his height still small and his determination and love unchanged. Even though Maes was gone, Roy had seen Ed's heartbreak, seen that yes, the kid did have a big heart for people other than his brother. It didn't give him comfort, it took all his effort to remain the commanding officer and yell when his youngest team member was insubordinate. The stirrings had become full blown and it was getting harder to ignore.

At sixteen Ed was a young man, temper, determination, love, unchanged. He was taller now, eyes more narrow, not so round with childlike innocence. There was the war – Bradley, and Ed's bravery shone through, his ability to discover the truth and harness the power. He loved the fact that Ed was so vibrant and full of life. He wanted Ed. He really wanted his young subordinate.

Hughes was probably laughing, hysterically most likely at Roy's misfortune. He missed his best friend who would often give him comfort when he needed it. There was no one now, and Hawkeye didn't do such a good time at it.

His eyes had lingered on his subordinate more and more often.

He was confused. This feeling was not right; not normal. Well, normal for him, at least.

He wouldn't touch him.

He could never have his young subordinate.

And that hurt.